FULLY LOADED CLIPS

Kevin Love at the buzzer…

“One game at a time”

“Rome wasn’t built in a day”

“You can’t win ‘em all”

“There’s always tomorrow”

“Better luck next time”

These are all pseudo-optimistic sayings that have been told to me following crushing defeats in my sports loving career. Unfortunately I subscribe to a different doctrine, anger and pessimism. I want to see blood. I want to see guts. I want to see Bobby Knight with Satan himself as assistant coach. Game’s like this always make me want to visit my coach’s gun idea. Here’s a quick breakdown:

1. In any major professional sport the head coach will be provided a revolver with ONE bullet. 

2. The coach’s gun may be used only on the coach’s OWN players.

3. The gun does not have to be used.

4. The gun may only be used to harm, as it is a coaching tool NOT a weapon.

5. The coach may choose to use the gun on himself (This would’ve been handy in the Dunleavy years).

6. The gun cannot be used on referees or fans.

7. The gun may only be used as a teaching tool not a preventative measure like shooting Shaq so he has to be replaced to make game winning free throws.

Last night was a coach’s gun sort of game. The game seemed out of control from the opening tip with the Clippers hanging on to their lead with a bizarre mixture of 3 point accuracy and cold shooting from the t-wolves. The game was billed as a Blake vs. Love match up (because CP3 was still out and couldn’t go against Rubio), but both players were largely underwhelming throughout the game (save for the finish). Blake has seemed to have a confidence problem for the last week seeming hesitant to take the ball to the hoop and instead just settling for 19 foot jump shots (he’s made ONE that I’ve witnessed this week). Clip’s Coach VDN must have told the guys to stay in front of Rubio and collapse on Love because the much maligned Darko scored like 75 points last night and looked like the second coming of Tom Chambers on Bulls vs. Lakers for the Nintendo. 

The game truly went sour when Mo Williams was ejected for his second silly technical foul. Both techs were Mo’s fault and he has earned a possible coach’s bullet for his actions, however, when he left the game completely fell apart. All the silly mistakes, turnovers, quick shots, and stupid 3s caught up to the Clippers. With 4 minutes to go in the game, the defense completely broke down and Chauncey Billups just started firing up random contested jump shots with no rhyme nor reason. I’m sure Billups looked around at Gomes, Foye, Solomon Jones, Reggie Evans, and DJ and said looks like I’m going to have to shoot EVERY time. At this point VDN needed to either try coaching or turn the coach’s bullet on himself and allow someone else (CP3?) to figure this mess out. 

The game ended as most Clipper games of the last 30 years have…in a crushing, soul-shattering loss. Ricky Rubio, Mr. I-haven’t-made-a-shot-all-fucking-night, nailed a 3 point goal from the corner with 20 seconds to go. Naturally the Clippers went with the old fashioned, Billups takes the ball wanders over to a lackluster screen and then drives to the hoop and blows what appeared to be a very makeable shot (for high school kids). Nicely, 1.5 seconds were left on the clock. Minnesota calls time out to advance the ball. The clippers all contracted  Cerebral Palsey and the rest was history.

Good news! I have acquired press passes for Sunday’s game against the Raptor’s, so I will have a full eyewitness report from the worst seats in section 331. Stay angry Los Angeles.

At 7:30 pacific time, the Minnesota T-wolves will tip off against my beloved Clippers in a match up that appears to evoke feelings of the Clippers’ past. Young PG Ricky Rubio has been pared with rebounding savant Kevin Love to make one of the brightest young duos in the league. The Clippers have seen this all before when a young Shaun Livingston was pared with Elton Brand to create optimism for the LA future. Shaun’s knee cap left town and soon after, so did Elton Brand. In today’s NBA teams are not really rewarded for building through the draft. Most teams need to get lucky in the draft and then sign those big name free agents. This is the first year in the history of the Clippers that they have landed some of those big fish. 

Minnesota is a young and pretty talented team that is not nearly as bad as their recent history would suggest. The Clippers need to hold serve at home with their next two games against these Timberwolves and the Raptors on Sunday. The Clippers have made a habit of playing well at home, but coming off those big games against Dallas, the Heat, and the Lakers, I certainly hope we don’t see any lapses in effort or concentration like we did in Utah. 

The T-wolves have won 3 of their last 4 including a nail-biting loss at the Hawks. The Clips on the other hand have won 4 of 5 and need to take care of business before the road schedule bites them hard in February. Look for Vinny Del Negro to play the starters for big minutes in the first half leaning heavily on Chauncey Billups and Mo Williams. DeAndre Jordan and Blake Griffin will have their hands full trying to control the glass with Kevin Love setting up shop down low. This should make for a fast, physical, turnover-fest, that the Clips should have under control by the start of the 4th quarter. Make some 3s, don’t let Love dominate, and don’t get caught up in all the slop, and we should take another home W into Staples Center for Sunday at noon.